I have blogged once before but have not touched it in well over a year. It was no longer fun or fulfilling...more of a chore than anything. I also began to feel huge amounts of pressure to try and live this "Blog Life" that would be more interesting to write about or photograph. This pressure was brought on by myself, and no one else. Which is worse, in my opinion.
Fast forward to now and I still feel the weight of proper grammar, witty lines, beautifully filtered photos of my day, and the potential of eyes reading my words. And yet this fear will not keep me from sharing and thinking out loud. Even if it is not the most interesting part of another person's day...it will matter to me. And I think that is what is most important. Right?
These feelings go hand-in-hand with why I have decided to focus so much on the word "content." We have lived in 6 places in 4 years. Moving and change have become a need. We have not felt "settled in" since we first got married and have done our very best to knock ourselves down for leaving. But we DID leave, and then we left 4 more times after that, and still searching for what "home" is. Searching for what the difference between "content" verses "settling" would be.
We have had the most feelings of home that we have had in 4 years, here in this place where we are right now. The truth is that there will always be a better town, job, opportunity, or house. However, as we grow in our marriage, faith, and more in love with our tiny family we are learning that it is not about where it is happening but with whom.
So, thank you in advance for reading. And thank you for just going with me on some things. It is nice to have a place to think out loud again.
No comments:
Post a Comment